New to this

Well, a new world has just opened up to me!! Having sat there on many occaisions reading the blogs of my friends, I thought I'd have a stab! I'm not really expecting to get anything like the views they get, but even if one person reads my ramblings then I will be very happy!

This is my blog about my fight with the fat I have gathered over the last few years! Im not grotesque but I am currently at the heaviest I have been throughout my entire life - including my thrid year binge at uni!!

Basically I want this to be an online diary of my attempt to lose 2 stone. In the past when I have attempted this I have given in to my lack of will power. The theory is, that if this is in a public domain, however small, I will have no option but to follow through with this evil plan!! I will be shamed into making damn sure I do it! I have a lovely boy, Steve, who is extremely supportive but as I'm sure many ladies out there will know, when you have piled on more than you imagined you would, your confidnce, will power, self esteem, self motivation and general care for life kinda goes out the window. You end up feeling pretty worthless.

Well I for one am sick of feeling crap. About myself and about the world around me. There are undoubtedly other factors, but with me, and many others, my weight seems to rule my whole being. I am essentialy an ambitious, happy person, but both of those qualities have been solowly ebbing from me over the last 12 months or so. Sadly I have only just realised, poor Steve has had to pu up with me being grumpy and low for far too long.

Don't get me wrong, I'm not aiming for the size zero, nothing like it, a size 12 would be wonderful though. But I hate diet plans. To me theres always someone wanting to make money out of people with low self esteem. Ok Rosemary and weight watchers have their successes, as did Mr Atkins (may he RIP), but I can't stick to nazi like regimes that they expect. Neither do I like the 'Posh' or 'Paris' celebrity diets that bloody magazines publish. To me, have an apricot for breakfast, a spoon of cabbage soup for lunch and a twiglet for tea is not my idea of a good days eating.

Which brings me to my major problem in life. I LOVE food!!!! I like to think of myself as a bit of a cook. There is nothing I love more than cooking a huge meal for all my friends to enjoy. I used to think that if I wasn't a teacher I should do something with food! Well, it turns out I do both. I teach during the day and scoff myself at night! However, my food isnt fat fried, or wrapped in cheese (erm, sometimes not strictly true), I thought it was relatively healthy. Well, my rapidly expanding waist line proves that wrong!

So, Each post will hopefully update my weight and calories, ways and means of losing weight, along with the personal hell I am about to enter into!! However, I intend to eat food I love - not a handful of raisins every 2 days!! I am hopefully going to be able to post recipes and ideas that WORK!!! and if it doesn't, well, theres always plastic surgery!!!!! Joke!

I hope this picks up a few friends on the way and maybe, just maybe help someone else. Time will tell. Might depend on just how boring my writing is!

Tomorrow, after some handy tapemeasure work, I am going to post my vital statistics and bare all the gory details - don't worry, I'm not going to do a Gok and put pictures of me in my scraggy underwear on the internet, no, no, any photos of me on here will be clothed!!

Hope to see you soon,

Nx

P.S You may be wondering about the picture; nutshell - this is possibly the only picture of me from recent months that I am happy with. Ok Im green, I'm the wiked Witch of the West, but i felt good and an ex boyfriend said I looked "Damn Hot" in green!!!